How to Spot Trouble Ahead for an Aging Loved One

As predictable as the cold winds that blow through New York and Connecticut every winter is the increased number of phone calls and emails we receive from panicked adult children. Home for the holidays, they are often shocked at how much an aging parent has declined since their last visit. During phone calls with them, they have said they are “fine” and they have everything they need. Then a personal visit proves otherwise.

Here are 10 questions you can ask families to help them spot trouble ahead for an aging loved one:

How do they look? Is their personal appearance showing a lack of attention to basic hygiene?
Have they had a significant change in weight? Dramatic weight gain or weight loss can be a sign of trouble.
Are their finances in disarray? Are bills piled up or the mailbox full? Are they receiving calls from creditors about unpaid bills?
What is the condition of their home? Is the trash piled up? The refrigerator full of expired foods? Are there odors in the home?
Are they still engaged in activities with friends in the area? Or have the withdrawn from volunteer work and pastimes they’ve always enjoyed?
Is there a change in their disposition? Is a normally sunny and outgoing loved one now grumpy and agitated or a quiet and thoughtful parent now suspicious and difficult?
Do you find their belongings in places they shouldn’t be? Reading glasses in the freezer or the house key in the refrigerator?
Are they complying with their medication schedule? You can check by looking at the date on their medication bottle, noting how many pills are left and how many should be left.
Can they answer questions you ask? If they are struggling with memory loss, they may have difficult answering questions or they may ask the same question over and over.
Do you hear them up in the night or notice a change in their sleep pattern? That may be a signal something is wrong.

Accepting that a senior loved one may need help can be difficult for adult children to do. If a family that you are working with answers YES to any of the above questions, then it may be a good time to refer them to Senior Living Options. We can assist them with starting the conversation and we can educate them on the various options available before a crisis does arise.

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Author: Ann Jamison

Ann Jamison is an experienced senior advisor who has successfully worked with hundreds of families to help them find the best care and home-like environment for themselves or their loved ones. Prior to launching Senior Living Options, Ann was an eldercare advisor for a national placement agency and served as sales director at a senior living community. Thanks to her 25-year career in advertising sales and marketing, Ann is able to discern between hype and reality for her clients. Ann recognizes that there are objective factors that need to be weighed when making a life-changing decision, but she can also assess the important softer attributes by getting to know her clients and by using the gut instincts that can only come through extended experience.